Don’t Take It Personal: Dear Russian (Русский)

[This is the first in a series of posts called “Don’t Take it Personal.” I will be writing letters to languages that have not been selected in this project, giving reasons for why I decided to “move on.” These will appear between regular posts, adding a more “comedic” spin to the blog.]

5/3/2009:

Dear Russian,

I’m sorry. This is as difficult for me as it is for you, but it would have never worked out. It pains me that I had to do this by letter, but I couldn’t face telling you and witnessing your heartbreak would have devastated me.

To be honest, I’m not sure where the spark went. When we first met, I had distanced myself from Spanish on terse terms and was in search of a new experience. When I found you, I was completely enamored by your Cyrillic letters and sounds, which was a wild and exciting change of pace for me.

There are so many things about you I adore to this day. Unequivocally, I enjoy  your palatal sounds and hearing of your Old Church Slavonic roots. You were the first Slavic language I got to know and I remember the pleasure I had every time I said your name, Russkiy (Русский).

And there is perhaps nothing sexier than hearing your voice whispered in my ear. How I miss it.

But alas, I can no longer feign that desire. After a short time, my interest had disappeared and I do not know why. I could also never tell you this before, but your noun cases were something I could not overlook without great difficulty. I could not live a lie.

I have been reading about other Slavic languages and Serbian has treated me well. I cannot predict the future, but I have high hopes that I will find someone right for me.

Please be well. I wish the best for you and hope things are going well with Ukrainian and Belorussian.

Keith

10 thoughts on “Don’t Take It Personal: Dear Russian (Русский)

  1. Wow, that’s pretty harsh! Basically, “I don’t like you and I don’t know why. Bye.”

    I guess it’s only a language though!

    xharasho, looking forward to the next letter.

  2. I love it! Can’t wait for the next, and for the next language.

    What “dialect” of Chinese are you doing? Mandarin? Maybe Cantonese? Have you started it or are you waiting for a bit?

  3. Also, you really should join Unilang! Judging by how much you love languages, I know you’d love it there too. (:

  4. Прикольная статья, но хотелось бы поподробнее узнать о некоторых моментах… Как можно с Вами связаться?

  5. At least you didn’t leave Russian for something trendy like Czech. Have you considered Bulgarian or Macedonian? They have that Cyrillic and OCS charm without the pesky case endings!

    Всего хорошего,

    А.

  6. Speaking of Ukrainian and Belarusian, they’re another two great languages to learn. Don’t let anyone tell you they’re “dying out”: the Ruthenian languages have together over 60 million speakers! And that’s the beauty of them: learn one, and the other is easily understood. Belarusian has the North Slavic accent of Russian but with an almost entirely Ukrainian vocabulary, whilst Ukrainian itself is one of the most idiosyncratic Slavic language around.

    I for one would love to hear your opinion on one of the two (though you’d still have to deal with the case system xD)

  7. i’d simply have to agree with you..the grammar is, simply put, mind blasting..and it’s all the more difficult to first think of what you want to say in english, and then to think about how to say it in russian, and then the grammar and the proper endings for each case, not to mention that the sentence structure changes and you’d have to sort of “make a u-turn” to make your point..by the time you are ready to reply, they are long gone..
    hahaha..
    sometimes i find it easier to just laugh and say “Da da..net..pachimu” <– standard response..
    gets easier with practise though..but i must say that i enjoy it nevertheless 🙂

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